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2.18.2009

Getting Back "Me Time"


I'm a stay at home mom, but I'm learning it may be more important to be a SYLM. As in a see-ya-later-mom! I've found, to be the best mom and wife, to have a happy home and a loving marriage, a stress-free week and a relaxing weekend, I need a little time to myself sometimes. A recharge if you will. It may seem impossible to fit it into you busy schedule, but if I can do it, you can too!

Getting time alone doesn't even mean you have to leave your house it can be as simple as handing your baby over your husband and taking a quiet, uninterrupted bath. Lock the door, turn on some relaxing music and try not to worry about the crying you hear downstairs. It's natural to want to run down and help, but this is your time...and it's only 30 minutes.

The moms in my neighborhood have a Ladies' Night once a month. It's supposed to be a game night but it's usually just a gabfest...about what else? Our kids. And that's okay. It's a time for all of us to commiserate, share our battle stories of labor, double check on if the dirty-diaper count  is normal and learn more than you'd ever want to know about ear infections, green snot and ear tubes. Having a ladies night can be as simple as getting together at a restaurant for a few hours after the kids go to bed or gathering at one person's house for a few hours of gabbing and drinks.

Working out is a stress reliever for a lot of women. The first few months of my daughter's life I found it challenging to work out. (Okay so I used her as an excuse because I hate working out). But anyway...I've realized working out for even an hour two or three times a week gives me a little time to unwind and burn off some energy. It helps me feel more healthy and boosts my self esteem. I feel like more than just a mom when I get done. It's also a chance for my daughter to work on the separation anxiety that she seems to be developing from being with me 24/7. My gym has a free daycare. It's perfect because I know my daughter is only a room away so if something is wrong the daycare providers can easily come get me. I always get scared when I see them walking the perimeter of the gym...why do I seem like the only one they come find to rescue my screaming daughter???

Run errands or go to the salon without dragging your baby along. Okay so running errands may not be fun, ever, but if you can avoid taking the baby, even just once or twice a month it will give you a little time to yourself. A fellow SAHM friend of mine offered to watch my baby while I went to get my hair done. It was a stress free trip to the salon knowing I didn't have to feel rushed because my little girl was getting fussy. If you can find someone who you can swap babysitting services with, even once a month, it'll really do you good.

If all else fails and the only time you get to yourself is nap time try to relax. I'm not going to say "sleep when the baby sleeps" because I know that's rarely possible. But don't break out the vacuum or balance the checkbook...instead get a have a cup of tea, read a chapter in a book, take a shower, dry your hair and put on a little makeup. Looking good is feeling good especially when you're a SAHM and it's tempting to stay in your pj's all day. Everything else will get done, just do it during the next nap. One nap a day deserves to be "mommy time."

Remember a happy mom is a happy home so find ways to get happy, relieve stress and get back a little me time. And don't feel guilty about it - you're doing everyone a favor!

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